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Funny Texts 51 – 60

51. Q: Saan nagtatrabaho ang mga uling?

A: Eh di sa COAL CENTER!

Siguro mainit sa COAL CENTER noh?

52. Summer Job Opportunities

Package 1

-P5,000/hr

-Enchanted Kingdom

-Taga-tulak ng Anchor’s Away

Package 2

-P7,000/day

-Palengke

-Taga-lista ng noisy

Package 3

-P800/min

-Star City

-Tagahila ng Roller Coaster

Package 4

-P900/min

_Quezon Ave.

-Ikaw yung humps

Package 5

-P5,000/hr

-PLDT

-Ikaw yung Dial Tone

Package 6

-P10,000/hr

-Mall of Asia

-Taga-ikot ng globo

Pili na ng Job!

53. A mom called her son…

Mom: Pauwi knb? Asan kn?

Son: And2 po ako sa hospital.

His mom cried..

M: Ano nangyari sau?!?

S: Nay, nurse kaya ako! Wag kang O.A. ha!

54. A chakang tambay noticed a kid staring at him. The tambay got angry.

Tambay: Hoy! Bat ang sama mo tumingin ha?

The kid shouted back.

Kid: E bat ikaw ang sama mong tingnan?!?

55.  Bruno: Ano yang nasa papel na yan?

Pedro: Listahan ng mga takot sakin.

B: P*&%*$@! Bat andito pangalan ko?

P: Bkit? Lalaban ka?

B: Oo!!!

P: E di i-erase! Pede naman e…

56. Paano kung tinamad na kong tamarin? E di ang sipag ko na nun? Ayoko nun. Nakakatamad…

57. May 1 pangit na lalaki na humiling sa fairy.

FairyGodMother: Ano ang yong kahilingan ginoo?

Pangit: May mapa ako dito ng Amerika, dalhin mo ako dun para matagpuan ang babae ng buhay ko.

FGM: Di pwede! Dito lang gumagana ang powers ko.

P: O sige! Maging mortal na babae ka nlng at pksalan ako!

FGM: Patingin nga uli ng tang-inang mapang yan at baka magawan ng paraan!! :)

58. Japanese archaeologist digging 100 m down found copper wire says, “Very good! Our great ancestors of 1000 yrs already had telephone!”

Americans dug 200 m found optical cable says, “My God! This means our great forefathers already had broadband 2000 yrs ago!”

Pinoy digs 500 m found nothing, says, ” Anlupit ng mga ninuno natin!!! WIRELESS!!!”

59. Erap dreamt that he died and went to heaven. St. Peter gave him Ai Ai delas Alas as partner, saying: Kung mabait ka sana, mas maganda ang partner mo!

Erap saw Chavit Singson with Gretchen Barreto and said,: “Bakit si Chavit, mas madaming kasalanan, si Gretchen ang partner?”

St. Peter: IHO, PARUSA YAN KAY GRETCHEN!!!

60. Juan: Bday ng asawa ko

Pedro: Ano regalo mo?

Juan: Tinanong ko kung ano gusto nya.

Pedro: Ano naman sinabi?

Juan: Kahit ano daw basta may DIAMOND

Pedro: Ano binigay mo?

Juanz: BARAHA!

For more text messages, please go to textmates.
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